Proust Questionnaire: macon's answers

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On Sat, 17 Oct 15 04:11:09 UTC macon (22) answered the Proust Questionnaire (click on a question to read other answers):

What do you regard as the lowest depth of misery?: to embody shame/grossness/cruelty, not just in your own eyes, but to everyone.
Where would you like to live?: somewhere that feels like home but also feels like there is always more to marvel at. a place where i can be my favorite version of me, whatever that means. more practically, a place with lots of sunshine.
What is your idea of earthly happiness?: to feel at home in my own body, to have both breadth and depth in the things i care about (education, relationships, experience), to be able to travel but also feel content with my home base, to breathe deeply and experience gratitude often
To what faults do you feel most indulgent?: indecision, narcissism, self-indulgence and self-loathing, cowardice
Who are your favorite heroes of fiction?: i'm not sure yet
Who are your favorite characters in history?: i wish some actually came to mind. i always found rasputin pretty wild.
Who are your favorite heroines in real life?: my mother and all other women that are strong, thoughtful, compassionate, sharp, warm, etc...a woman like a lighthouse
Your favorite painter?: modigliani is certainly one of the many
Your favorite musician?: i'm not sure i could even narrow it down to my top ten favorites. the list is too long and it changes frequently.
The quality you most admire in a man?: thoughtfulness, adaptability, energy, integrity, humor
The quality you most admire in a woman?: thoughtfulness, integrity, strength
Your favorite virtue?: i struggle to find any one virtue that doesn't bleed into another
Your favorite occupation?: learning, sharing, exchanging
Who would you have liked to be?: myself, but in all the ways i wish things were/might be different...joanna newsom is lovely though, i wouldn't mind being her i suppose. but i wouldn't mind be many people, i think.
Your most marked characteristic?: skeptical idealism? is that a thing? inconsistency. dissatisfaction. regret.
What do you most value in your friends?: worlds outside of my head, to love and be loved
What is your principle defect?: i wouldn't know where to start. the basic neuro stuff doesn't help though. ambivalence and disgust.
What to your mind would be the greatest of misfortunes?: to have died any of the times i wished to
What would you like to be?: "incendiary"
What is your favorite color?: i don't have one. i'd like to wear more black, though.
What is your favorite flower?: each and every flower that pulls you out of yourself and shakes you and shouts in your face that the world is delicate and beautiful and pleasantly surprising
What is your favorite bird?: i'm going to say a cardinal. not because it is my favorite bird. i'm not sure what my favorite bird is. but the cardinal's significance to my mother and her parents is better than any bird i can think of. i'll probably think of one later, though.
Who are your favorite prose writers?: dfw, pynchon, foucault...i need to read more things and more often (i get so lazy and use my reading for school as an excuse...i mean it is a lot but...still)
Who are your favorite poets?: this question just inspired me to start reading poetry again. i think that the last i really read was roethke or pessoa?
Who are your heroes in real life?: there are too many to list. more than i'll ever even recognize, tbh.
Who are your favorite heroines of history?: i wasn't sure but i looked at other people's answers and one list included ronald reagan and now i just can't stop chuckling to myself
What are your favorite names?: i really like the name lucy. i like many names but lucy is special. a lucy was someone who inspired me and whose life ended far to soon.
What is it you most dislike?: meaningless pain, abuse, when any alternative would have been better than what we chose or allowed
What historical figures do you most despise?: it's hard to name even a few without worrying about omissions, my own ignorance, etc.
What event in military history do you most admire?: the only thing i know less about than world history is military history
What natural gift would you most like to possess?: beauty in all senses of the word
How would you like to die?: having contributed something good
What is your present state of mind?: my meds have worn off and i'm avoiding my metaphysics reading so...
What is your motto?: i don't have one yet

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